Change Is A Fight

So I almost threw in the towel this morning! The alarm went off at 3:30 and my body screamed, "SCREW THIS"! I closed my eyes again thinking, this sucks, I have to go or I'll be letting myself down as the other side of my brain said, "SHUT UP, I'M TRYING TO SLEEP OVER HERE"! 3:45, second alarm. I can't do it, I just can't. I've been working so hard, I physically do not have it in me this morning...but I have to. I sat up, laid back down, punched the bed and sat back up again. I have to. I was right on both counts, I did not physically have it in me to run 8 miles today, but I had to do something...so I rode my bike instead. Its called cross training and it reduces the likelihood of injury! Its been about 5 years since I rode regularly so it was tough, especially on the uphills, but I got my butt out of bed and I worked out, I didn't let the little voice inside my head that tears me down everyday win. I won. I showed myself that I am in control of what I do, of how I am, of my health and my life. I don't do it for anyone else, no one else would even notice if I stayed in bed. I don't do it for attention, half the world is still asleep when I start pounding pavement. I do it for me, I do it to feel better physically and mentally, I do it...because I can, I do it...for my life.

Sometimes Change Comes Early (Like 4AM Early!)

Well, I came up with that training schedule I mentioned last time and it gradually takes me up to the 13 miles I will need to run in May.
Of course, there is that old saying, best laid plans and all... I have actually been really good about sticking to the schedule for the most part, until this week that is. I worked the schedule out so that I am running on Monday, Wednesday and Friday and this week I was scheduled to do 5 miles each day for a 15 mile week. Instead I did 5 miles on Monday, a 6 mile walk on Tuesday and 8 mile runs on Wednesday, Thursday and Friday! That's right, 35 miles! More than double the plan!
Why you ask? With mom's truck being our only usable car at the moment and her not being able to drive and me not liking driving it by myself (for those that don't know, it's a stick shift) I have been running from home to the hospital every morning (at 4AM!) to pick mom up from work! If I thought I had it in me, I would take her TO work and run home too, but I'm not there yet so that part is on someone else! :-) I will be doing this or riding my bike until she is able to drive again...and maybe after that, come summertime it may be the only bearable time of day to run!